Our Lady of Perpetual Sin, the church turned bar and base for a variety of mercenaries. It was also home to the owner and the man who went by a variety of names, Zero. What money he didn't skim off the top for mercenary jobs he made in selling weapons. Were the weapons used for good? No, of course not, they're weapons. But his ability to pull anything from a form of media, especially weapons helped. It also allowed him to bypass those nasty things like registration forms, weapons brokers and reality. Some of his weapons went around reality all together, something he was known for. If someone wanted strange, peculiar and questionable weapons he was the one to come see.

He had a whole new variety he was going to be testing out. However he knew better than to test them himself. Sure he had the skills to do it but if they malfunctioned that was it, game over for him. But luckily he had a friend who could survive them should they malfunction. So he sent a quick text to Lunaria Wilson. It was simple.

'Need help testing weapons. Piranha Gun'

That should've been all he had to send. He also didn't need to mention where he was. Primarily since he was a sort of shut in and rarely left OLPS. Sure he left on occasion, but not as often as he should. He controlled OLPS and no one there could harm him. Everything that happened there he had control of.

In the back of OLPS, going through his little apartment, was a shooting range. It was only used by him, Luna and a very small group of trusted associates. Of course he also didn't exactly trust most people. Well actually he didn't trust anyone except Luna. Of course he didn't fully trust her, for reasons that covered his body. He had a few booklets in front of him with drawings. On a table were a variety of weapons. Hanging on the other end of the range were a series of dead pigs. Mostly because it'd been a slow day and he didn't have any dead mercenaries to use.

It’s a messed up world

Back door bitches begging me to behold All their cash and cars, platinum, silver 'n' gold "We're like diamonds in the sky" that is what we are told No mountain made of

money can buy you a soul

Lunaria had been sleeping on the floor of some crumby motel in Detroit. She'd been sent out there for some job that had literally been a wd goose chase and boy had she been exhausted. The bed was uncomfortable, probably the reason she opted to curl up with the hellhound on the ground. The big black dire wolf-esque creature. Was curled almost protectively around the succubus, doing his best to keep her warm as she slept. Dreams of fans galore haunted her sleep. Literal fans, the kind meant to keep someone cool in the summer. The monstrosities were chasing after her through a mansion, trying to tear her apart. It reminded her a little bit of Scooby Doo, really.

When the text came in, it woke her up. The loud ringtone was only enhanced by it's closeness to her head. "Go away fans," she mumbled as her eyes shot open. Shadow lifted his head as well to look at her but she put a hand on his head and told him everything was fine. Reaching across the canine, she grabbed her phone to look at the text. At first, she didn't get it. Rubbing her eyes a bit, a yawn escaped her and she started to put it down before the message clicked. "PIRANHA GUN?!" she yelped. "FUCKIN' RIGHT!" She was quick to gather all of her stuff together, just throwing it into her bag before getting the teleportation device from her costume's belt and wrapped it around her waist. Crawling on top of Shadow with her bag, she entered the coordinates to Our Lady of Perpetual Sin into it and slammed a hand down to activate. Within seconds, she appeared in the bars lobby with Shadow. She left the bag on the demonic canine and told him to stay. Her face got a good lick before she was allowed to leave.

The one thing she forgot to do was get dressed into proper clothes so she was still in her pajamas. Which basically boiled down to a pair of underwear and a spaghetti strapped tank. Even if she did notice, she likely wouldn't have cared, though. Skipping through the bar, she made her way through the back to his apartment and then the shooting range, a big grin on her lips. "So is it just a piranha gun or are you finally making my BFG 9000 dreams come to life?" she asked, bouncing a bit after she came to a stop beside him.

tag: @zero words: xxx notes: did this via phone. if anything needs changed, just let me know!
template by eliza @ tb & adoxography

Zero didn't have to wait long, well not as long as he thought he might have to. Because clearly she hadn't even bothered to get dressed. Of course he was perfectly fine with that. He couldn't think of any possible reason to hate that. When she was there he looked at her with a smile before unscrewing the top to a flask and taking a swig.

"No BFG, at least for now. I do have a few weapons I need to test out and you're the only one who can survive it if they go wrong, which might happen. I've got a few fun weapons to try out. Although I suddenly have an idea for a weapon that converts the wielder's clothes to some sort of energy ammo. Think of it like a lethal T-shirt gun."

He said with a laugh. Sure it was just a joke but it's not terrible idea. Sure she'd need to wear a lot of clothes to make it not run out of ammo in one shot, but still. That was the only reason he was torn on the whole thing. Usually he preferred when she wore as little clothing as possible, he was simple like that.

"Now we have a gun that shoots piranhas for starters, then it gets really fun."

He said patting what looked like a massive rocket launcher.

"This we save for last. I'm most excited for it and will make the BFG look boring."

He was proud of some of them, but the last one he was most proud of. Especially since if it worked it could be a huge seller. So we'll go piranha gun, acid grenade, octo-launcher and then things get really weird."

It’s a messed up world

Back door bitches begging me to behold All their cash and cars, platinum, silver 'n' gold "We're like diamonds in the sky" that is what we are told No mountain made of

money can buy you a soul

What were clothes, anyway? Her pajamas were perfectly fine for anything she might have to do. It wasn't as if there was much that was going to be able to hurt her, after all. What was there, anyway? Something might blow up? Oh no! Then she might have to sit and wait to heal for a half hour. The horror! But really, she didn't care. She never really cared. She was sure the entire world had seen her much, much worse at one point or another. Ah, the internet, it was such a magical place when it came to stuff like that, wasn't it? A place where everyone can enjoy the thrills of other people's hotness. She reached out as he took a swig to snag the flask. She couldn't ever really feel the effects, but that never seemed to stop her from trying, now did it? Taking a swig, she listened to him speak. When she was done with her swig, she closed the top and tried to slip the flask into the elastic lining of her shorts, only to realize she wasn't wearing any is it fell to the ground. Oops.

"What must I do to get a BFG from you? It can't be that hard, right?" There was a bit of a pout on her lips as she said that, though it didn't last long, not when she thought of the uses of a t-shirt gun. "There is this strong part of me that just wants that so much. And yet... that would require clothes and, well, the most I like to wear is a spandex suit. Just wouldn't bode well for me. But you? Oh man, you would do so well to use it, Weasley." She laughed lightly as she said that. She probably should try to be a little more serious but, well, what was seriousness? Especially when she hadn't even had her coffee this morning yet. There was just no way she could possibly be serious about anything at the moment.

"You say that like there's ever a moment where you're actually serious." Luna rolled her eyes at the little voice. "I can so be serious. Look, I'll be serious right now, see?" With that being said, she tried to give the most stern look she could. "See? Totally serious." If it wasn't for Zero's own voice, she probably would have kept trying to argue or prove a point to that annoying little voice. everything sounded great but then he brought her attention to a rocket launcher. She swore it almost reminded her of the sort of thing Jinxie had in that game. What was it called? LoL? Something like that. Heh, lol... those were the worst initials for a game ever.

"You underestimate the sheer awesomeness of the BFG. I mean, have you ever actually played a Doom game? Such words are blasphemous!" However, she did want to get started so she put her arms out, ready for whatever weapon he handed her. "Really weird's my middle name! Actually... it's Angelique, but that's because someone thought they were funny. But that's besides the point, let's get started, baby!"

tag: @zero words: xxx notes: woot
template by eliza @ tb & adoxography

He watched her try to pocket the flask only to let it fall on the floor. Honestly part of him was hoping it ended up in her waistband only for him to have to grab it. He grabbed it and pocketed it and laughed as she asked what she had to do to get the BFG from him. He tapped his chin and looked her up and down, smirking a bit.

"Oh Loo Loo I can think of several things you can do to earn it. But in the mean time we have weapons to test."

He said with a smirk. He began examining the weapons, ensuring they were all ready, and still solid. The last thing he wanted was for the weapon to fade mid use. That could prove very messy for the both of them. Especially since some of these weapons have a lot of energy built up in them and it has to go somewhere.

"Trust me Looney Tune, the concept of you wearing more clothes goes against my instincts. Plus those aren't my style of weapons. Not to mention if you wanted me nude we both know it wouldn't be that hard. Er, well, you know what I mean."

It was weird to see him so comfortable with someone. Mainly because that was a rarity for him. He usually stayed inside Our Lady of Perpetual Sin. Mainly because he preferred to keep to himself. But Luna was one of the few people he felt comfortable around. He let her go on rambling and talking to herself. He'd grown up around her and her father, it wasn't really weird. He knew just let her talk and eventually she'd lose the argument and come back to reality.

"For the record Loola Bell I prefer you not serious. ANytime you get serious I end up hurt."

That wasn't the most accurate, primarily since anytime they were together he usually ended up shot or stabbed. He hated it but he'd come to accept it as an inevitability. As she held her hands out he handed her the piranha gun with a smile.

"This one's pretty simple. Point and pull the trigger. It is semi-auto. Go ahead Loo, light 'em up."

He said stepping back and crossing his arms to observe.

It’s a messed up world

Back door bitches begging me to behold All their cash and cars, platinum, silver 'n' gold "We're like diamonds in the sky" that is what we are told No mountain made of

money can buy you a soul

Lunaria gave a small chuckle as she shook her head at him. "Oh Zero, you know I need to be wooed for that! I mean, at the very least, make me dinner before making such insinuations. Or, you know, a BFG. That could probably work really well in your favor," she cooed, throwing a wink in his direction. It was weird, she'd grown up around him pretty much, grown up calling his family auntie and uncle. And yet she probably would never be able to see Zero as family. What probably made that fact weird was the fact that people usually saw people they grew up around like that as family. Did that make her wrong in some way? "For once in your miserable life, no, that doesn't make you wrong or dirty or weird. It makes you, dare I say it, just a little human." "Awww, that's the sweetest thing you've ever said to me!"

She started to laugh again. "Oh I know, but that doesn't mean it wouldn't be fun, now does it?" Especially since she would genuinely love to see how such a gun would actually work. Can anyone even begin to imagine it? Just a gun, some medium sized gun. Someone picks it up, expecting it to be some over sized pistol or something. They pull the trigger and suddenly the gun starts to suck up a piece of their clothes. They don't have the speed to stop it. Before they know it, they're topless, regretting they forgot to put on a bra, in front of the whole world and just shot some guy with an energy blast that tore a hole right throw their chest. Shit, if that wasn't already a video on YouTube, she might have to make it. Blackmail some assholes into helping her create a stellar piece of art and watch it make millions on the internet! "Not sure that's how YouTube works, Lunes."

Luna started to open her mouth in protest to what he said but quickly closed it again. It was true, when she got genuinely serious, people started getting hurt. Huh... it must run in the family. Her father had always been the same way, hadn't he? It didn't matter, what mattered now was the guns. She beamed when she felt it in her arms, starting to weigh it herself before getting ready to shoot. She waited for his cue to turn and pull the trigger. "Dinner tiiiiime~" she sang out, excited to see just how a stream of piranhas would fire out of a gun. Maybe, if she was really good, and one survived, she could get a new pet! Or, you know, feed Shadow.

tag: @zero words: xxx notes: whoosh~
template by eliza @ tb & adoxography

"Well ya see if I make you a BFG then you won't keep coming around looking for it. Well, until you break it or it fades over time. Then you come crawling back. Begging me for another one. But I'll tell you what Princess Brimstone, if everything goes well with this testing, I'll make you one...maybe."

While he'd never admit it that was true. He was worried once he made her what she wanted she'd never come around. Sure she might pop by if she needed work but that was about it. She was easily his best friend, well that and someone hot he wanted more with. But he didn't want to lose one of his friends, well really his only friend. He ignored her half of the internal conversation, as he often did.

"I'm not sure how the piranha will fire, I'd expect it to drop as it travels. It's semi-automatic, only way I could get around the reload. Ideally it'll be automatic one day."

He said sitting back and watching, taking a swig from his flask. As the first one fired it slowly dropped, not as fast as he'd expected. But the piranha were bred to be more ferocious and almost sterotypical. It hit the pig on the thigh and latched on.

"Well that would be uncomfortable. Not fatal unless it hit the throat, but most certainly fun. Go ahead and let me know how the aiming works. I'm worried it'll be more random and as accurate as a mini-gun."

He was hoping for something more specific and dead on, but wasn't sure he'd get that. Anyone could make a gun that fired randomly. Well ok that wasn't entirely true at all. Most couldn't make a piranha gun, but most didn't have his powers.

"When you're done we'll move onto the napalm gun. Or would you rather do the dagger pistol?"